Damned Banks

So, off we go to the bank. I’ve given them 2 personal references from people here (one is from one of the bosses in the bank – Edgar who owns the”spa island”), one reference from my UK bank, 2 bank statements, proof of ownership of the island, a legal document from my lawyer (once altered to their liking), a copy of my passport, copies of the Mathew’s passport and residency and now, the final piece of the jigsaw – the RUC (along with the copy of the POA for my accountant and his resident’s card)……Don’t hold your breath…..now I need 2 references from suppliers of the company. Hang on a minute, how can I have suppliers if I don’t have a bank account? At this point I was ready to scream. Oh wait a minute, if I want Ben as a signatory, I also need a letter, in Spanish from myself with his details authorising it. OK then. So, off I trot to Managua to get all the relevant paperwork from Matthew and Omar the lawyer. The journey back is in a mini mini-bus, standing bent over double. aarrggghhhhhh.

Lilly’s (my landlady) martinis were oh so very welcome at this point. Drinks were with Chiles and Nacho (apologies for what is probably the absolute wrong spelling) as well as Lilly and Kathy and later joined by Jen (the other tenant here). Chiles and Nacho are also building a hotel but on Omatepe, so we swapped stories and problems.

Later, myself Jen and Kathy went to the infamous karaoke night (and still din’t sing).

The following morning I handed over the paperwork to the accountant to present to the bank.

Hahahaha. How could I be so stupid, now the need a “matriculation” or something of the sort that will cost me another few hundred bucks and to get this, we need copies of all the permissions from the planning department. Oh yes, and also, copies of Ben’s passport and residency. aaarrrgghhhhh. We arrange to reconvene at 3pm.

Sitting in the bank and now being told that the legal department had to check on the papers checked by the bank manager before an account could be opened which would take another 3 days prompted me to 1) nearly throttle the manager, 2) take all the paperwork with me to another bank that wasn’t so rule book orientated. Oh yes, and now we needed 2 references for Ben too. aaarrrrggghhhh.

Saturday rolls along and guess what, the legal department need something else from the lawyer. How about some blood. Don’t forget, I want to give them money, not get a loan. However, allegedly, if Ben and I turn up on Monday, we will be able to open it .hahahaha. I’ll believe that when I see it. I started this process about 2 months ago…..

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